I was in a state of exhaustion for a couple of weeks while preparing for my trip to Haiti. My body was rejecting the new malaria medication, my blood pressure stayed dangerously high and sleep was next to impossible with all that needed to be done. Giving away my sectional couch, the dining set, the washer and dryer, and even my car was far easier than dividing up the years of memories and making hard decisions about what was sentimental and should be kept, what could be thrown away, what others could use and what should be taken to Haiti for the orphanage. It was truly an emotional roller-coaster. The most important question I had to ask myself was: Am I really committed to devoting two years of my life for the children? The answer was always a definite "Yes!" The hardest part was the actual physical efforts of packing, going through the boxes and boxes and boxes.... to move things out of the apt. from the third story and get it someplace else. With the help of some very dear friends, it finally happened in the last few days before departure. After I was finally out, I only had about three days to take care of business and say my last goodbyes. I was very happy to have one last time to spend with my son. It was a wonderful ending to a long month of crazy.
The day I was scheduled to leave, I thought I would end up in the hospital instead of the airport. My blood pressure was off the charts again, my chest was feeling very tight, my heart was pounding and my skin was very red from head to toe. We called the doctor and he said it sounded like an anxiety attack and that I should try to find a way to relax before going. When I told him I was leaving for the airport in 45 minutes, he said, "Well....Good Luck and try to calm down!" Thanks, Doc!
It took all my strength and energy just to check in and get to the gate after the security check. One more time, I had to re-pack everything. When I finally sat down on the plane, I just knew I was going to die before the plane got off the ground. My luck! Instead, I started praying and I kept on praying to God and asking him to heal me, to restore my health and to please let me make it to Haiti to fulfill this mission. I made it to Miami for a very short sleepover and was back on the plane first thing in the morning to meet with another group that were also going to Bayonnais. Although I only slept three hours, I actually felt rested and was very excited to finally be going. God answered my prayers with His blessings and I am still thanking Him for that.
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